Why root doesn’t bear fruit!

“Sadly, the ones who hold the spotlight for others cannot come under it!’”

………………

She is a Mom’s girl, and in her life, her Dad is nowhere near the pedestal. And in any case, it is difficult to tell someone ‘about to enter teens’ to like or dislike something on its merit. That age goes more by ‘apparent’ than by ‘profound’…

Last time when I was at their house, I again heard her eulogizing her mother’s role in a contextual conversation, while her dad sat there smiling all the while. Later, as I stood in the balcony, she came and stood beside me. When she asked what I was thinking, I said what I wanted to tell her for a long time…

I said “You know something. While your mother is around you more often, tends to your every need and comes across as the one who loves you more; he has made huge contributions to your life – though silently and less explicitly. It is not just about playing the stereotyped ‘earning’ role; he has transformed almost everything about himself – his schedules, priorities, desires, and even his nature. He has done everything he can to maintain many complex intrapersonal and interpersonal threads to give to you two the ecosystem that you live in. In fact, he has even rationalized his expectations from your mother so that the bond between you two can remain unaffected”.

I paused and then continued…“You know girl…root doesn’t bear fruit, but it is the reason for it! It’s just that some entities are more interested in creation rather than credit.”

………………

Decades ago, during World War II, Winston Churchill had said that the real war-heroes are not just the army men, but also the coal-miners who provide army men with the most essential of resources. He had famously said that “They choose to stay in the pits and dig continuously with their faces in the coal, so that someone can go there and work in the defense of liberty”…

Well! This post is not about mother vs. father, or even about Churchill. It is about the fact that there are coal-miners in the life of each of us…

…Let’s learn to appreciate the role they play! 🙂

 

About Sandeep Atre

Sandeep Atre, PhD: Dr. Sandeep Atre is the Founder-Director of Socialigence – an organization that specializes in the development of ‘Social Intelligence’ through its focused online-courses and customized workshops on ‘observing nonverbal behavior and understanding emotions for greater interpersonal effectiveness and self-management’. (www.socialigence.net) He is also one of the Founder-Directors of CH EdgeMakers - a leading ‘Coaching and Training’ group of Central India. In his career of close to one and a half decade, he has trained thousands of students, and professionals of more than fifty organizations and institutions. He has authored two books “Understanding Emotions Logically – A layman’s guide to the foundations of Social Intelligence” and “Observing Nonverbal Behavior – An exhaustive guide to the essential skill of Social Intelligence” and has also been a noted blogger for last many years. He has also featured at various prestigious platforms as a ‘Management Speaker’ and ‘Motivational Orator’ and has also served on various advisory and editorial boards. He has earned repute for his value-additive innovation and holistic methodology in his domain.
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