I have always believed that “In life, sadness is always bearable as a standalone…but gets heightened in contrast”.
………………
I discretely remember everything about that day. It was a festive night and I got the news that one of my loved ones got pretty unwell. And from that moment on, every single detail of that experience is etched in my mind like a name on the rock.
As I drove through the messy traffic and cluttered roads, I could not help but notice how high everyone was on nonchalance. Maddened by the spirit (s) of festivity, there were laughing faces all over. Faces that saw me as an interruption to their right to cover everything with sparks, sound and smoke. And I remember all the angry looks they gave, wanting to shoo me away.
Well! Somehow, I managed to reach the place and entered the room which was almost sealed so that the sufferer can be spared to some extent, if at all.
But, not to be…
That whole night, I saw him going through excruciating restlessness…trying to sleep but twitching on a cracker-noise every now and then. All the while, he kept turning over in the bed, bereft of strength to even open his eyes. And the whole night, I was numb. Not angry or sad – simply numb. The agony I felt in those hours was so deep-seated that it is still fresh in my mind, and gives me shudders even now.
That day, I learnt that the most damaging experiences of life are not that of sadness. They are that of helplessness. You don’t feel bad, you feel violated…humiliated.
………………
And that night, I also learnt that…the most painful loneliness in life is when you are amidst a sea of people and nothing around you suggests that you are lonely…but… you are.
About Sandeep Atre
Dr. Sandeep Atre:
• Counseling Psychologist and an internationally recognized ‘Emotional & Social Intelligence’ Expert, with experience of more than two decades in helping people ‘sort out’ and ‘excel in’ intrapersonal and interpersonal matters. He holds a PhD in Management and a Master’s degree in Psychology (www.dratrecounsels.com).
• Founder of Socialigence – a venture specializing in development of ‘Social & Emotional Intelligence’ and its offshoot interpersonal skills through workshops and an award-winning online course rooted in neuroscience and psychology (www.socialigence.net).
• Author of two books related to his domain, namely - “Understanding Emotions Logically” and “Observing Nonverbal Behavior”; and third book on various aspects of life, named “Two Paras of Everyday Wisdom”. Moreover, the collection of his Nazms and Ghazals is published as a book titled “Baat Jazbaat Ki”.
• Corporate Trainer, with experience of close to two decades. Has conducted 150+ workshops/sessions for 50+ organizations & institutions like CSC, Cummins, Piramal, Ranbaxy, Lupin, Bridgestone, Michelin, Eicher, Maruti, Force, Idea, Airtel, NBHC, SBI, HDFC, L&T, Zydus, Thapar University, Banasthali, Narsee Monjee, Symbiosis, IIFM Bhopal, Azim Premji University, Nirma, Welingkar & IBS Hyderabad.
• Co-Founder and Director of CH EdgeMakers – a leading ‘Coaching and Training’ organization of central India for more than 24 years. He has trained close to 100 thousand students for ‘Soft Skills’ & ‘Entrance & Recruitment Preparation’ (www.ch-india.com).
• ‘Management Speaker and Orator’. Has featured at platforms like TEDx, IIM, IIT, NIT, CII, YI, CII-IWN, TCS, IMA, ICAI, ECA, ISHRAE, NEN, Sahodaya, Aditya Birla Education Academy, Round Table, LinkedIn Local, Rotary International, MP State’s Teachers’ Training, Academic Staff College DAVV, Police University Rajasthan, Police Training Academy Indore & more than 100 institutions.
• Member of noted associations and boards. Has been an ‘Executive Committee’ member of Indore Management Association. Associate Editor of IMA publications. Governing Council Member of Banasthali University’s SBBJ Centre for Research in MSME & Promotion of Entrepreneurship in Women. Executive Member of IMS, DAVV Alumni Association. Member of Rotary International’s ‘Group Study Exchange’ team to Minnesota, USA. ESI Coach with FWSA Australia.
Note: For glimpses of work, watch YouTube Channel ‘Dr. Sandeep Atre at Socialigence’.
