The only time when we live as human-beings is childhood! After that… it is just a constant struggle to remain social-beings! In fact, I believe that the only time you love or ‘are loved’ is in childhood. Grown-ups don’t love…they only expect! So grown-ups’ love is nothing but “trying to live up to each other’s expectations”!
But what changes as we leave childhood behind…? Well! Let me explain…
We were born with only two emotions: Feel-good & No feel-good! …rest all we acquired as a side-effect of living in society. So, only these two are our natural emotions (what God wanted us to feel)…and all others like depression, anger, grief, vengeance, angst, guilt etc. are our social-emotions (what we are made to feel in the name of being social-animals).
Interestingly, all these social-emotions actually come as bipolar Siamese-twins: happiness-grief, vengeance-gratitude, bliss-depression, anger-reverence etc. So, it is impossible that you feel one of them without automatically getting eligible for its twin… When you choose one, you actually chose both!
And what really fascinates me is the way society programmed us to get governed by these social-emotions; so that then it could align all of us into conformity…and we all fell prey to it, helplessly! Thus if we want a more aware-living, it is important to deprogram ourselves a bit!
In all my arrogance, I am assuming a right to make an enquiry into them. So, in coming days, I intend to take each one of them (depression, grief, anger, vengeance, frustration, guilt etc.) at some point of time and would do some thinking-aloud!
My only request… Don’t see it as a cynic’s attempt to bust the myths or an intellectual’s foray to self-praise. It is at best an individual’s enquiry into society’s intentions… to redeem his Right To Individuality!
PS: in case, you are looking forward to it then also wish that nothing more interesting happens to me in coming days, because if it does, then I allow myself complete liberty to get distracted, and…you will have to bear ‘reading about that’! My RTI!
About Sandeep Atre
Dr. Sandeep Atre:
• Counseling Psychologist and an internationally recognized ‘Emotional & Social Intelligence’ Expert, with experience of more than two decades in helping people ‘sort out’ and ‘excel in’ intrapersonal and interpersonal matters. He holds a PhD in Management and a Master’s degree in Psychology (www.dratrecounsels.com).
• Founder of Socialigence – a venture specializing in development of ‘Social & Emotional Intelligence’ and its offshoot interpersonal skills through workshops and an award-winning online course rooted in neuroscience and psychology (www.socialigence.net).
• Author of two books related to his domain, namely - “Understanding Emotions Logically” and “Observing Nonverbal Behavior”; and third book on various aspects of life, named “Two Paras of Everyday Wisdom”. Moreover, the collection of his Nazms and Ghazals is published as a book titled “Baat Jazbaat Ki”.
• Corporate Trainer, with experience of close to two decades. Has conducted 150+ workshops/sessions for 50+ organizations & institutions like CSC, Cummins, Piramal, Ranbaxy, Lupin, Bridgestone, Michelin, Eicher, Maruti, Force, Idea, Airtel, NBHC, SBI, HDFC, L&T, Zydus, Thapar University, Banasthali, Narsee Monjee, Symbiosis, IIFM Bhopal, Azim Premji University, Nirma, Welingkar & IBS Hyderabad.
• Co-Founder and Director of CH EdgeMakers – a leading ‘Coaching and Training’ organization of central India for more than 24 years. He has trained close to 100 thousand students for ‘Soft Skills’ & ‘Entrance & Recruitment Preparation’ (www.ch-india.com).
• ‘Management Speaker and Orator’. Has featured at platforms like TEDx, IIM, IIT, NIT, CII, YI, CII-IWN, TCS, IMA, ICAI, ECA, ISHRAE, NEN, Sahodaya, Aditya Birla Education Academy, Round Table, LinkedIn Local, Rotary International, MP State’s Teachers’ Training, Academic Staff College DAVV, Police University Rajasthan, Police Training Academy Indore & more than 100 institutions.
• Member of noted associations and boards. Has been an ‘Executive Committee’ member of Indore Management Association. Associate Editor of IMA publications. Governing Council Member of Banasthali University’s SBBJ Centre for Research in MSME & Promotion of Entrepreneurship in Women. Executive Member of IMS, DAVV Alumni Association. Member of Rotary International’s ‘Group Study Exchange’ team to Minnesota, USA. ESI Coach with FWSA Australia.
Note: For glimpses of work, watch YouTube Channel ‘Dr. Sandeep Atre at Socialigence’.
